So Much to Accept

Dear Lord; Happy Tuesday Father!

As you know Lord, at the beginning of the year instead of making New Year’s resolutions, I chose to take part in an exercise intended to provide a more focused perspective on the year ahead.  The concept was to pray intently for Your Guidance in choosing a single word to serve as a primary component of my life in the coming months.  And although I came up with a number of words that I personally felt fit areas I needed improvement on, You repeatedly placed the same word in my heart over and over…

Accept.

Well Father, I may not have completely agreed with Your Word Choice when You impressed it upon me, but looking back over events of the last five months I can honestly now say… Ok, I get it.

Here are some of the ways Your Word Choice has presented itself in my life:

I’ve come to Accept that I can’t fix everything, and that I need the assistance of others (this one’s been tough for me in many ways).

I’ve learned to listen for Your Guidance more carefully, and Accept the direction that’s given.

I’ve Accepted that Your Assistance to us comes from many places and in a variety of forms, and that our true Blessings may not always be those most obvious to us.

I’ve Accepted that the path I’ve laid out for myself may not necessarily be the one You Intend for me, and I’m excited to see Your Will unfolding in my life.

It appears I had more that I needed to Accept than I thought I did… 🙂

Heavenly Father, I thank You for the direction and guidance You Bless me with each day.  As I pray to You each morning; Please help me make decisions today that best glorify Your Will, and guide me to be Your Hands and Feet to serve those around me.  Amen.

~Phather Phil

Running on Fumes

Dear Lord; Happy Wednesday Father!

You know Father, I still find it amazing the ways You find to impress things upon my heart.  In today’s case for instance, my morning lesson came from the gas gauge on my dashboard.

I was on my way in to work, when the quiet of my morning ride was unceremoniously interrupted by a loud “ding!”.  Looking down at the dash, I realized that my trusty vehicle was trying to draw my attention to the fact that I was quite low on fuel.

“I’ll be ok” I thought… “I can keep going for a while yet.”

For some reason though, You seemed to feel that this was a good learning opportunity for me.

“You’ve felt that way before.” I heard You whisper.

Ouch!  I knew exactly what You’d meant by that too…

When I was in my early 20s, I knew everything.  I prided myself at always being one step ahead, always staying in control of every situation, and in never needing anyone’s help.  My life was a non-stop roller coaster of work, caring for a rapidly declining mother and grandfather, and one self-destructive relationship after another.  During that period I averaged three to four hours sleep a night, and many of those were obtained through alcohol induced collapse.  Yep, I had it all worked out… I could burn the candle at both ends and deal with whatever came my way.

I was running on fumes.

And like my truck Father, you can only function that way for so long before you just… stop.

In my case, the “dead on the side of the road” moment came with the onset and diagnosis of my son Jonathan’s disease shortly after he was born.  In one decisive stroke, I became painfully aware that I wasn’t as in control as I had disillusioned myself into believing.  I was lost, and terrified, and felt completely disconnected from what I had always held onto as being finite and real.

And yet Lord, in that humbling and pain, You began my rebirth.

Sometimes Father, as I’ve learned, we need to be stranded on the side of our spiritual road before we can begin the real journey.  Thankfully, You pick up hitchhikers.  🙂  Now I keep my “Faith Tank” full, and try to follow Your GPS to where You need me to be.  I don’t always get there directly, but I’m learning new roads each day.

Thank You for Your “Road Side Assistance” program Father.

Amen.

~Phather Phil

P.S. Today marks one year from the very first “Email to God” that I ever posted.  It was simply a tongue-in-cheek message sent to my Facebook Wall that read : “Dear Lord, we thank you for another day and all the blessings you have bestowed upon us. Just a note however, I think you left the water running last night… Amen.  ~Phather Phil” (It was a particularly rainy day.  🙂 )

Thankful Thursday: Multitudes on Mondays

Dear Lord; Happy Thankful Thursday Father!

This evening Lord, I’ve decided to try something a little bit different for our Thankful Thursday conversation.  Instead of focusing on one specific thing You’ve Blessed me with, I’m going to take a page from the idea behind “Multitudes on Mondays” as described in the book “One Thousand Gifts” written by Ann Voskamp, and make a list of some things I’ve been thankful for this week.  I haven’t actually read the book, but a number of my fellow blogger friends have taken up this Monday tradition, and reading their posts it just seemed to fit very nicely with the concept of Thankful Thursday.

And there’s so much to list Father, so let me get started…

1. Smiles and hugs from my boys when I come home from work.

2. Dark, fresh, hot coffee in the morning.

3. Photowalks with the kids.

4. Living within 25 minutes of both a state forest and a quiet beach.

5. Feeling the spring breeze wafting over me as I watch the sun set beyond the trees.

6. Sitting at the firepit on our back deck and enjoying time with friends.

7. Holding my wife Shannon as she falls asleep.

8. Dark beer.

9. Cooking for my family and friends.

10. Reading the inspiring and encouraging posts from my fellow Christian Bloggers.

11. Curling up with the kids and watching TV together.

12. Having a job that continues to bring me new challenges and growth.

13. Pulsatile Nasal Irrigation (the only true defense I’ve found against allergies)

14. My son Jonathan continuing to be in remission.

15. Contact lenses.

Heavenly Father, thank You for these and all the other Blessings You bestow on us each day.  You are indeed a wondrous Lord, and I lift my heart to You in joyous praise.

Amen.

~Phather Phil

Spiritually Malnourished

Dear Lord; Happy Monday Father!

Today Father, as You know my thoughts and prayers were very much reaching towards Shannon as she began her new job.  This transition has weighed heavily on her heart, but today went very well and I believe she’s feeling better about her decision now.  Either way, thank You for watching over her today and every day, and guiding her along this path.

Mondays are generally busy days in my office Lord.  And while it’s wonderful from a business perspective to be inundated with work, days like today can hold my focus to the point of excluding other important activities from the list… like eating.

I really meant to take a break and get some food today, but it just never happened.  One project led into another until I looked at the clock and it was already after 4:00pm.  Driving home, I had to pause for a few moments as I got a little light-headed… not a good sign for me.  By the time I got to the house, I was tired, hungry, and even a bit on the grumpy side.

Very much like when I haven’t talked to You in a while Father… Spiritually malnourished.

With the crazy schedules we maintain these days, spending dedicated time with You can sometimes be slid aside by activities we feel are more pressing and immediate.  The catch-22 is of course, that maintaining a tight personal relationship with You is just as vital to our well-being as is food to eat, or air to breathe.  When we don’t spend that “meal time” with You each day, we suffer as a whole.

Nourish me Father…  Feed my desperate spirit.

Heavenly Father, thank You for the Blessings You bestow on us each day.  Please fill us with Your Presence, and sustain us through Your Word to lead the lives You Will for us.  Amen.

~Phather Phil

Musings on Mother’s Day

Dear Lord; Happy Mother’s Day Father!

This evening Lord, I wanted to pay tribute if I may, to two wonderful mothers in my life; my mother who passed to Your Kingdom in 1995, and my lovely wife Shannon.

I was very Blessed Father, to have an excellent mother-figure in my life growing up.  She was an intelligent, funny, caring woman and worked diligently to instill a sense of honor, understanding and perspective in my brother and I.  Although she battled multiple forms of cancer for over 15 years, her focus was always on caring for and nurturing us.  She was an amazing lady, and although I miss her a great deal I know I’ll see her again someday.  🙂

And Father, You Blessed me yet again with the wonderful lady You sent to be my wife.  She has truly been the epitome of the “ideal mother” to our boys, and I couldn’t be more thankful for her.  Today, we had a lovely Mother’s Day afternoon together.  It started with a late lunch at the local Celtic Pub, then we rode out to Woodland Beach for a walk along the shore to gather sea glass for Shannon’s craft projects.  I of course, carted along my camera and here are some of my favorites from the day:

Aidan spent the bulk of his time wading through the shallow water, finding rocks for his “collection”, and playing in the sand.

Jonathan started out with the idea of shooting photos as well, but the lure of playing in the sand and wading in the cool water quickly had me carrying his camera instead.

It was truly a lovely day out; around 75 degrees and sunny with a light breeze to keep the bugs away.

Shannon spent much of her time scouring the beach for bits of “sea glass” for her crafting projects.

We got the boys involved in the glass search as well, and they had a great time searching out these bits of treasure.

All in all Father, it was a lovely afternoon.  As always, I thank You for the Blessings You bestow on us each day, and for the remarkable examples of motherhood You’ve placed in my life.  Amen.

~Phather Phil