As You know Father, the last couple weeks have been particularly stressful for me, and I’m afraid in several situations I allowed myself to weaken and give audience to Satan’s voices of dissent within my heart…
You’re not worthy of God’s attention…
You’re weak…
You’re alone…
I can still get to you…
And yet, through all these attacks on my spirit Lord, You were right there. You’ve quietly reminded me of my true identity, sent me fellow brothers and sisters in Christ to bolster my reserve, and through Your Word have helped keep my eyes focused on Your Kingdom.
And then this morning, You gave me a very special gift…
As I’ve mentioned before Father, I quite enjoy the path I take to work each morning. I consciously avoid the highway, and instead travel a series of smaller back roads that run through much more rural settings.
My route also holds one further benefit.
For a short portion of the drive, my truck heads due East; affording me a wonderful front-row seat as the sun lifts above the horizon behind the farmlands ahead. Most mornings it’s a lovely scene, but today it was particularly breathtaking. The air was vividly clear, save for a thin line of clouds that dotted the horizon. Lying behind that smoky veil, the morning sun’s radiance streamed upwards, seeming to burn rays of light into the heavens. It was truly a marvelous sight, and as I smiled in recognition of Your handiwork, You let me know why…
“It’s for you…” You said.
For me?? I momentarily struggled with my disbelief, but it was just too powerful; the wall came crashing down and I clearly understood Your message:
You love me Father, and You’d move heaven and earth that I should know it.
What an amazing gift Lord… I am truly humbled, and forever changed.
About this time last year Lord, I joined with many of my Christian Blogging brothers and sisters and began to think and pray about choosing a single word to guide my steps throughout the year. In the end, although I was unsure as to why at the time, You very clearly placed the word “Accept” on my heart.
As I look back over the past year Father, Your reasons for Blessing me with that word become very apparent. 2011 was a year filled with struggles, and joy, with pain, and enlightenment. And yet, when I attempt to “compile” the year’s experiences and summarize what truths I’ve been given in that time, Your word for me keeps showing up…
I Accept that I can’t fix everything, or solve every problem…
I Accept that I’m dependent Father; needy of Your presence in all parts of my life.
I Accept that only by consistently seeking humility before You, can I find true strength.
I Accept that I’m Your Beloved Child.
And so many others Father… “Accept” makes perfect sense to me now.
So now we come to 2012.
As You know Father, I started praying about this year’s word a couple weeks ago. You’ve been relatively quiet on the subject so far, but this morning on my ride to work You broke that silence…
Well Lord, once again, it’s not what I would have chosen, nor what I expected. Nonetheless, I trust You Father, with all my heart, and Accept this word as the precious gift it is. I have no idea what part my word will play in the coming year, but I Promise to keep my mind, and my heart, open to Your voice.
You know Lord, as I look back over the “Emails to God” I’ve written to You over the past year, it amazes me how much we’ve discussed, how much ground we’ve covered, and most importantly how far I still have to go on my Walk to Your side.
The other thing I find fascinating Father, is to see how those who’ve come to share this journey have found us. Through the statistics engine in place “behind the scenes” here on phatherphil.org, I can drill down and get very detailed information as to what sites, searches and links were followed to land people on these posts and pages. It also allows me to see which of our conversations generated the most interest, and which posts led the most readers to comment as well.
It’s a fun look back over our year together Lord, and today I’d like to share those results.
Top 5 Search Terms Used
Google’s engine is some kind of mystery Father. While in some cases I understand completely how certain search phrases lead people to find this site, there are others that just leave me scratching my head. Nonetheless, the top five phrases that were used last year to find this site were:
1. my son’s birthday
2. come to me all you who are weary
3. being used
4. mercies in disguise
5. a beautiful prayer
Top 5 Posts by Views
It’s always interesting Lord, to see exactly which of our conversations were most sought out. Not only does it help to give me a better perspective on what topics are close to people’s hearts, but it also serves to help guide my prayers going forward. Funny enough, the top five posts for 2011 contains several of my personal favorites as well:
One of the most profound Blessings that’s come from sharing our time each day Father, has been the wonderful people I’ve connected with. Through their emails, comments and fellowship, these beautiful souls have been an important part of our conversations Lord, and I am forever Blessed by their contribution. Everyone I’ve connected with has been a true gift Father, but in 2011 these ladies were a part of the most conversations:
All in all Lord, 2011 was an amazing year of spiritual discovery and growth here at PhatherPhil.org, and I’m very excited to see where You’ll take this journey in 2012.
And now Father, on to the Thankful Thursday list of Blessings! This past week has been an eventful one to be sure, yet through all the peaks and valleys Your Blessings have shone brightly. I’m truly thankful Lord, for all of the many gifts You surround our lives with, but this week I’m especially grateful for:
496. A fun “dinner and games” night with some wonderful friends last Saturday.
497. A powerful, inspiring final session of the “Plan B” group study this past Tuesday.
498. That You are a God of infinite contingencies.
499. The cleansed feeling the world gets following a morning rainstorm.
500. The difference in perspective I’ve received by listing these first 500 Blessings.
501. Fresh Draft Beer.
502. The outpouring of compassion and support we received upon the passing of our dog this past weekend.
503. That when I begin to doubt that I’m following Your desire, You find a way to send me reassurance.
504. Friends with beautiful hearts who share them willingly.
505. That even when I’m clumsy in my Walk to You Lord, You’re there to steady my footing.
506. New members to our Tuesday night small group.
507. Being given almost seventeen years with our little Pomeranian, Hunny.
508. A good friend who came to my aid last Saturday morning.
509. That following a week-long illness, Jonathan is back to his happy, obstinate self. 🙂
510. Situations that stretch my faith, and help me grow in my Walk.
Heavenly Father,
I thank You Lord, for the multitude of Blessings You grace our lives with each and every day; both those that reveal Your presence with splendor, and those that Bless us in the Stillness.
Well Lord, I had every intention of writing You a completely different post today. It came to me this morning, I thought about it throughout the day, I researched the Scriptures involved at length, and then…
You shifted gears on me.
It happened while I was driving back from picking up a prescription refill at our veterinarian this afternoon. I’d elected to take the back way there; giving myself a little added “quiet time” to gather my thoughts and contemplate my post a bit. There I was, riding along deep in thought, when all of a sudden I got that “pay attention” nudge I’ve come to know. The song on the radio had just changed, and the lyrics immediately caught my notice…
Wow Lord… I’ve felt like this more than once as of late…
You think I’d have it down by now
Been practicin’ for thirty years
I should have walked a thousand miles
So what am I still doin’ here
Reachin’ out for that same old piece of forbidden fruit
I slip and fall and I knock my halo loose
Somebody tell me what’s a boy supposed to do?
I get so clumsy
I get so foolish
I get so stupid
And then I feel so useless…
Clumsy… What an apt description of how I feel on my journey to You sometimes Father…
I stumble…
I trip…
I take the wrong “fork in the road”…
And yet…
But You’re sayin’ You love me
And You’re still gonna hold me
And that You wanna be near me
‘Cause You’re makin’ me holy
You’re still makin’ me holy, yeah
Looking back over the last year Lord, so much has transpired here at PhatherPhil.org. Hundreds of “Emails to God” were shared, precious connections with fellow Christian bloggers were formed, friendships were developed and nurtured, and each word I wrote drew me ever closer to Your side. It’s been a powerful first full year Father, and I’m excited to see how You’ll use this ministry in the coming months.
Continuing my weekly tradition into the New Year Lord, I present You with the first Thankful Thursday list of 2012! And even though we’re only a little less than a week in, signs of Your gracious love abound. This past week I’ve been especially grateful for:
481. Our Tuesday night Small Group Study gatherings starting back up following a two week break.
482. Seeing the excitement in Jonathan’s eyes working with his new electronics project kit.
483. Seeing Your Blessings showered on a friend and her family this week.
484. Sharing a stuffed crust pizza with the kids.
485. The “Walking Dead” marathon on AMC last Saturday. 🙂
486. A wonderful visit from our good friend Katie over the weekend.
487. Seeing Your influence in unexpected places.
488. An extra day off this past Monday to relax and rejuvenate.
489. An inspiring and uplifting message delivered by a guest pastor at Ewell’s-St. Paul UMC last Sunday.
490. That during the many struggles I faced in 2011, each time You used those times of trial to draw me closer to You.
491. A reminder from a dear friend today that even in the midst of our struggles, Your Blessings abound all around us.
492. Your calming restraint when I feel myself getting angry.
493. Celebrating the beginning of the New Year in the company of close friends.
494. The cleansing appearance of our first (albeit minor) snow this morning.
We thank You Lord, for the many gifts You grace us with each day; both those that announce Your glory like the first light of dawn, and those that Bless us subtly like the shadows of the setting sun.
Hi, I’m Phil Malmstrom, a.k.a. Phather Phil. I’m self-employed, father of two wonderful young men, an ordained minister who delights in spreading Jesus’ Message of Hope and Love, a science-fiction junkie, an aspiring photographer and above all that one of God’s Children who rejoices in His Blessings each day.
Hi, I’m Phil Malmstrom, a.k.a. Phather Phil. I’m self-employed, father of two wonderful young men, an ordained minister who delights in spreading Jesus’ Message of Hope and Love, a science-fiction junkie, an aspiring photographer and above all that one of God’s Children who rejoices in His Blessings each day. 
